I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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