I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
We are all done wearing pants today
Randomize
