He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
