So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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