i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
