she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Is it penis luge time yet?
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Boobs speak an international language.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
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