how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize