I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I would fuck him just for his dog
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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