i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I would ride that face into the sunset
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