So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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