I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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