i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
