Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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