are you still at the devil's house?
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
This couple is walking their pig around campus
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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