I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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