Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Randomize