and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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