i permit you to call me
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
