I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
