You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize