eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
