I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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