I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
