I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
