We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
