East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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