I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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