google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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