So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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