Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
