remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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