You just made me feel so damn special
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
The beer is more important than you right now.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Randomize
