What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize