know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
