There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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