Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
