i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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