I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize