i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i came on her dog
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
