Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
