She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize