They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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