Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
He felt like a one man threesome
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
