True but thats because hes a fetus.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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