He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
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