I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Randomize
