ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
