i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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