Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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