Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
wow bdsm is so cute
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
