Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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