You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize